scream

..she opens her mouth, nothing comes out.
she has so much to say, but can't find the words..
..she wants to be heard, needs to be heard.
she closes her mouth, shes filled with regret..
..she wants to return to those days in the sun.
she had so much going for her, but now its gone..
..she hates her life, she just needs respect.



..I guess you can tell how I feel.

Whoever said opposites attract..was wrong!

So I hung out with I.H. saturday the 13th it wasn't bad actually. But wow, how awkward. Probably wasn't a good idea to choose the movie 'Valentine's Day' there was kissing every five minutes in it. He doesn't talk alot, he's really quiet and i'm the complete opposite. He's like a country boy and i'm like a city slicker. He loves country music and i HATE it! I love piercings and tattoos and well he doensn't really. But i've got to give him credit. He's a pretty nice guy. But I highly doubt I would want to hang with him again.

Lost Faith

My whole life I was brought up to believe in God, this higher power. I went to church on Sundays, even when my parents didn't. I attended Wednesday nights as well. I even became a member of the Gallatin FBC Youth group, so you could say i'm a christian (or was). But you see I was ALWAYS the bad one, and my older sister, Shelby, was the good one. But that was only how people viewed me, they didn't get to know me before they began judging me. They went by my appearance and the way that I acted. I guess I wasn't serious enough. I even did everything I was supposed to do. I listened, I attended everything. I even gave up my free time to participate in lock-ins and Camp. But yet I was still "bad". Lately I find myself slipping away, badly. I can't take this judgement, and the more I listen to the lessons, the more things don't seem real. Like how can one man be SO powerful? I just don't understand. I've been testing my faith, and I just don't think I believe anymore.

Maybe I'm Just Naive.

Is it wrong to really like someone older than you? Or is this just one of those many phases I'm going through? I tend to have a thing for older guys. Maybe it's just because they're actually somewhat mature. Maybe it's because they know just what to say and actually mean it. Or it could possibly be that i'm just stubborn. I can't help myself this time, but I really think I like this guy. But I know it shouldn't be. Maybe someone my age will come along and save me from making possibly the biggest mistake of my life. But I can't help to think that maybe it's not...

Bucket List

So i've created a bucket list of all the things i want to accomplish in life before i die.
I always thought creating a bucket list was stupid, but its actually fun. I only have 36 things so far but I plan on having more, and I hope to accomplish every single one.